How low can your breakup go?
In romantic relationships we build worlds and it feels really terrible when that world gets destroyed. If It’s a kingdom as large as China or a face me I face you apartment with shaky foundation, the loss feels the same. Yes,yes not all breakups involve throwing glass cups. I admit there are nuances but most breakups are messy.I have had a LOT of nasty breakup so you can call me the breakup queen. This queen would love to show you how to navigate that space properly so you don’t loose your head.
Do not pick up the phone: I know it seems like a tempting idea but biko drop it. He/ she calling after a few days of the break up has you feeling like a giant slayer, SMH. The truth is the person is most likely calling because he /she is alone or high on something.If the temptation is too great, dance to your ringtone. Also, do not call him/her either. Your future generation is counting on you not to embarrass them. Do not open the door: You may be faced with a situation where your ex is in front of your door, with all the affection. DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR. I am sure in your mind you are thinking ‘no big deal ,we will just talk, I need closure’ laughs in heavenly tongues. You people wee not talk oh, in fact you will end up more confused than you were when you started. If you are really tempted, go and sleep.
No friends zone: All this ‘let us be friends’ talk will leave both of you going round in the circles of confusion. Even if you broke up on good terms, you need time to grieve. Grief and healing is essential in post breakup treatment and that is impossible if you are ‘friends’. Unfollow on social media: I know this may seem petty but it is necessary. If you continue to have constant access to their social media, you would probably die of anxiety. You will start imagining scenarios that most likely do not exist. Besides this stops you from sending those long paragraphs that make it seem like your dignity has gone on holiday. Remember you can not heal from a wound you constantly keep touching.
To successfully recover from your break up, you need to face the situation with courage. Disrupt your patterns. I am sure you are tempted to sleep and cry all day but travel, go out with friends and avoid sad love songs (especially Adele and Sam smith songs). Use your support system and give yourself grace. We deal with breakup differently. This is just Tomiwa advising you not embarrass your ancestors like she has done in the past. May the gods of breakup be good to us.
How do you deal with breakup?
Any other tips on how to behave appropriately in this space?
Do you agree with my tips?